WHAT IS AN ORGASM

The Longman dictionary says that an orgasm is 'the climax of excitement in sexual intercourse'.

Another definition of the orgasm is 'the peak of sexual arousal when all the muscles that had tighten during sexual arousal relax leaving a lovely feeling that can sometimes include the whole of our body'.

What happens during orgasm?

Most people agree that sexual intercourse, masturbation or simply the touching or stroking of our bodies can be very pleasurable. For some, however, and possibly for most of us at some time or another, it goes beyond just pleasurable.

During sex we usually experience much more than pleasure. Our breathing gets faster and heavier as our heart pumps faster and our blood pressure increases.

Blood is pumped to our genitals which creates the the tension which will trigger a spasm of the genitals.

Muscles throughout the rest of the body can also spasm, although for some it may be more of a tingle.

Hormones, such as endorphins are pumped around our body and then to the brain telling us we are enjoying it. Some people feel giddy or sleepy after an orgasm.

Some women can experience an orgasm just thinking about sex or by having their breasts touched, it doesn't always have to be connected to the genitals.

For most, however, direct genital stimulation is the way they achieve an orgasm, either during sexual intercourse with a partner, when masturbating and when using a sex toy.

Some women can achieve an orgasm when either the clitoris or the vagina is stimulated. Most women however have orgasms through stimulation of the clitoris.

Clitoral Orgasm

Achieved when sexual stimulation of the clitoris is performed in a rhythmic pattern, starting slowly and getting faster as the sexual tension and excitement heightens.

Vaginal Orgasm.

Inside the Vagina you can find the G spot (named after the researcher Grafenberg who 'discovered' it. It is a small bunch of nerves about an inch or so inside the vagina near the navel. These nerves swell and become very sensitive during sex. Some women find that during stimulation of the G spot they spurt a clear fluid, this is a female ejaculation.

Some women have trouble reaching a climax when having sexual intercourse with a partner. During these times manual stimulation of the clitoris with the hand, tongue or sextoy etc is needed if an orgasm is to be achieved.

Many women say they have loving and tender sex with their partner but then masturbate to achieve an orgasm, either in private or in front of their partners.

Many women are lucky and manage to achieve multiple orgasms

When making love with a partner an orgasm doesn't have to be the ultimate goal. You can enjoy the time feeling loved, aroused, sexy and safe.

Orgasms can't always be achieved, so don't worry just enjoy the time. We all seem so hung up on whether we have orgasms, give our partners orgasms and whether we're 'doing it' right.

Having a huge explosive orgasm doesn't always indicate sexual satisfaction but if you particularly want an orgasm and your partner can't seem to give you one don't complain or accuse - do it yourself.

YOU ARE NOW AN ORGASM EXPERT,

SO PRACTICE, PRACTICE,  PRACTICE.