ABOUT MASTURBATION AND MASTURBATION TIPS

Masturbation - Is the manual stimulation of the sexual organs and has been frowned upon throughout much of history and, in fact still is in some cultures.

Masturbation - Can be the stimulation of another persons sexual organs or our own. For most of us masturbation is something we do in private.

Is Masturbation Normal or Harmful?

Some women are still afraid or shy about exploring their sexuality and using masturbation as a sexual tool.

Religion is probably the most difficult obstacle to the  enjoyment of sex. Women can feel ashamed of their sexual urges and won't even talk about the subject. Some women masturbate briefly from time to time but feel terribly guilty about it.

Although masturbation is talked about a lot more now, many of us still remember times as a child when we were made to feel bad or dirty if we touched ourselves 'down there'.

People were often told they would go blind or mad. This feeling can still often rear it's ugly head when, after the excitement of touching our own sexual organs and usually allowing ourselves to reach orgasm, we then start to feel guilty or ashamed. 

Today, thankfully, the general opinion among therapists and health care professionals is that masturbation is not only 'normal' but is a healthy way to explore our own sexuality and bodies.

Masturbation can be very satisfying and great fun. It can release sexual tension without the risks that can go along with having sexual intercourse, such as pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases.

Many people, for whatever reason are not in a relationship but still need to release sexual tension from time to time.

Some people are in a relationship, but either don't feel satisfied after sex with their partners, or indeed simply like to pleasure themselves.

Female Masturbation

Many studies have been done on the subject of female masturbation and we think it true to say that females masturbate more often than is believed - in fact it is probably true to say almost as often as men.

Women may not feel the sexual urgency to masturbate as often as men but they can have certain periods of heightened sexual arousal, especially during puberty.

Women often say their orgasm during masturbation is much more satisfying and intense than the orgasm achieved during lovemaking.

For some women masturbation can have other benefits besides the sexual pleasure itself. Some women find it helps them sleep better, or that they have more energy. During a period some women report it can help relieve any discomfort they feel. Many men don't like having sex when a women is having her period but at that time women can feel very aroused so masturbation is a brilliant solution.

Another benefit of masturbation is that there is no fear of pregnancy or disease.

Masturbation can help us learn about our bodies

Unless we touch and explore our own bodies or have a very considerate partner who enjoys touching us we can't really know exactly how  bodies respond to different touches and sensations. 

Masturbation doesn't have to be done in a hurry when the sexual need is urgent.

Set aside some unhurried time when you are relaxed to learn about your body and what you enjoy.

Take the phone off the hook and find a room where you feel comfortable and will not be disturbed. Play some nice relaxing music.

If you intend using sex toys make sure you have them ready along with a good sexual lubricant.

Take your time. If you tease and caress yourself to orgasm the orgasm is likely to be much more intense and satisfying.

Don't just concentrate on the sexual bits such as the clitoris or the penis. That will usually bring us to orgasm quite quickly, but it can be much more satisfying if we take our time and touch and stroke other bits too, such as breasts and thighs.

Masturbation brings much less guilt than it used but most people still don't feel they can experiment and only use their own hands and fingers when bringing themselves to orgasm.

Use different  and unusual items and materials to stroke your body or stimulate the sexual organs e.g. A shower head, a feather, a soft brush, a soft silky scarf, or of course the good old vibrator.

We have come far in accepting sex and masturbation as a natural pleasure we now have literally dozens of vibrators and other sex toys to choose from. 

Some women admit to having quite a few different vibrators and sex toys to use on different parts of their bodies.

Masturbation Tips for Women.

Clitoral Stimulation.  The clitoris is the one part of a woman's body which is purely for sexual pleasure so make the most of it.

Most women find the best way to reach orgasm is to stimulate the Clitoris - in fact for many it is the only way.

Rolling the clitoris. Place your thumb and forefinger around the clitoris and gently roll it between your fingers. Start off slowly then gradually get faster whilst adding a bit more pressure. Some women find using two hands increases the sensation.

Shower Head. A hand held shower head is great for directing straight onto the clitoris and vaginal areas. Sit or stand depending which is more comfortable and ensure the temperature of the water is as you want it. Experiment with the direction of the water pointing at slightly different areas.

Circling. This masturbation technique can be good when you are desperate for sexual relief and want to Orgasm in a hurry. Using two fingers from each hand place them over the clitoris. Move the fingers around in a circular movement. You may find the speed and pressure will need to be increased quite quickly but the orgasm can come fast and furiously.

Stroking. Hold the clitoris at it's base between two fingers whilst stroking it with the other hand using either just one finger or more applying gradually more pressure.

Jacuzzi. If you are lucky enough to own a jacuzzi or hot tub the jets of water can give you a wonderful feeling. Start by just sitting in the warm water thinking naughty things and gently stroking your body. Once you feel ready let the jets gently  massage the clitoris. The water stream can sometimes be very powerful so start by keeping at a distance from the jet and move in closer to a comfortable level.

Brush Strokes. Think your blusher brush was just for your face? Think again. many of your make up brushes can make brilliant sex toys especially the larger ones. Start by using gentle brush strokes around your body including your nipples, working down towards the vaginal area. You may find it starts to feel frustrating and want to dive down there with your hands but persevering with the brushes can bring you to an earth shattering climax.

Two Hands can be better than one. Use one hand to play and tease the clitoris whist inserting two or three fingers of your other hand into the vagina. Gently start thrusting the fingers using them like a penis and continue to play with the clitoris in whichever way feels best for you. This technique can bring about an incredible orgasm.

The big build up.  Whatever masturbation technique you are using don't let yourself orgasm the first time around. When are very close to orgasm, as difficult as it may seem, stop yourself. Relax for a moment and then start again. The more often you can force yourself to do this the more intense the orgasm will be when it comes.

Clitoral stimulators Along with all the above clitoral masturbation techniques there are loads of clitoral stimulators you can buy to add to your repertoire. You can buy finger clit stimulators as well as clit vibrators and remote control clitoral simulators.

Vibrators - Vibrators are mostly used for clitoral stimulation but many can also be used vaginally. Rabbit vibrators are great for both as they have a separate little clit stimulator at the top. Experiment with them or have more than one for different functions. Vibrators can also be used over the rest of the body like the nipples and the inner thighs.

Dildo's - A great sex toy. They can be used to emulate a penis for vaginal stimulation. Some dildo's have sucker pads to enable you to straddle them. You can gently rub a dildo against the clitoris gradually increasing the pressure and speed.

Tip. When using a dildo internally stimulate the clitoris at the same time either with the dildo or your other hand. 

Another fun idea for using a dildo is to lubricate it well and place it flat on a hard chair. Position yourself over it and organise yourself so that it runs completely under your vagina and bottom. Slide backwards and forwards so that it gently stimulates the whole area including the clitoris.

G Spot stimulation  Some women love having the g spot touched and teased. By inserting two fingers inside the vagina and moving them gently away from you in a type of 'come here' action in reverse many women find this extremely satisfying. G Spot Vibrators are also available. 

Breasts - Should never be forgotten. Gentle stroking and fondling of the breasts is a huge turn on for most women. Teasing the nipples creates a wonderful sensation. Some women like to attach nipples clamps to enhance their excitement. Women with large breasts can sometimes even lick and suck their own nipples.

Fantasising During Masturbation

Women are often easily aroused through emotions as well as physically and many find that their sexual fantasies can be a huge part of their sexual enjoyment. Never be afraid of having sexual fantasies, they often enhance our sexual pleasure.

Some sexual fantasies women have reported they have experienced whilst masturbating or making love are : Lesbian Sex, (quite a common fantasy), Multiple Partners, Orgies, Young Partner, Bondage, S & M, Fireman, watching others have sex, plus many more. The fact is, it doesn't matter because it is just a fantasy.

Mutual Masturbation

Although masturbation is usually a solo pursuit done in private some people find they enjoy mutual masturbation with their partners. It can be a form of foreplay or a complete act in itself. Sex toys can also be incorporated into the action.

Some couples find it very exciting to masturbate in front of each other or both pleasing one person at a time. A woman could massage her clitoris whilst her partner inserts fingers or a toy into her vagina

When lying in bed it can be lovely to feel that hand gently making it's way over to your naughty bits and you then do the same. If lying on your back it can help to open your legs and place one leg over your partners leg to allow easy access. Lying back to back and placing your arm behind you reaching your partner sensitive region is also a great turn on - a bit of height adjustment may be necessary. Of course you don't have to be lying in bed. If you are on the couch watching a sexy film mutual masturbation can be just the job.

Lubrication. Using a sexual lubricant is a must for many of the masturbation tips given to avoid soreness and uncomfortable friction. If you think some oral sex may also be on the books then a flavoured lubricant may also be a good idea.

Masturbation is generally considered to be healthy, normal, fun and safe so there is no need to feel guilty or dirty.

Once you've had the chance to explore your body, your sexual responses and preferences, you will not only enjoy it when on your own but you will be able to bring extra imagination and skills to your sex life when with your partner.